Working Out Feels Good....

Who knew???
Uh, ME!!! :)
So, why haven't I been doing it for so long?
I think I may have gathered some insight into that.
This morning I got on the Wii and I did my 1/2 hour and it wasn't a hard workout or anything, not such a huge deal, but I felt good. Really good!!!
I was happier today, noticeably, and just feeling really good!
I like this feeling , I want to keep it :)
I think the reason I quit doing things that make me feel so good is as simple and as complicated as this: I feel guilty when I am happy, and I don't feel like I deserve it!
Huh!
I thought I had worked that one through already when I wrote my post on deserving.
I guess I need a refresher :) 
I am ready to be as happy as I can, I am ready to make being happy my full time job :) 
I deserve it, we all do! 
I will not hold myself back any longer.  I am making a commitment to myself.
I will get back to working through my stuff and most of all to loving and accepting me. 
It is way past time. 
I am deserving!!!
I guess I could have just said that I completed my workout, and it felt good, and I have completed day one, but I guess I had some other stuff to say too :)

That's all for today!
Bye for now,

Am I Struggling?

I was thinking about this earlier.
I have been eating a bit more junk food than usual lately.  I feel a little tighter in the waist area.  It is that time of the month, but I am pretty sure that junk food is the culprit.
So anyway, I was standing in the kitchen just now, and I was wondering - 'Am I struggling?'
I have been having this thought a lot over the last week or so.  It pops into my head and out again just as quickly.  Just an annoying little blip.  Something to be easily quieted with a cookie...or three.
But just now, when that question popped into my head, I stopped.  I thought.  And I had a flash of what 'struggling' feels like.  The 'accidental' overeating, the guilt, the shame, the anger, the stomach aches ;) 
Did I really want that?  Do I really want that?
Do I prefer feeling that way?
Ummmmmmmm......NO!!!
If I choose to struggle, then I am choosing those consequences.  I choose to feel awful.
Over the last week or so, when I would wonder if I was struggling, I would recall the three cookies I ate earlier, or the extra snack, or whatever and I would think - "Yes, I am struggling", and so I did.  That question started the cycle each time.  It was kind of like I was giving myself permission to fail.
I don't know what caused all of this to flash into my head just now.  I am just glad that it did.  I am glad that I stopped and really thought about it.
Am I struggling?
Of course not!
I am choosing to not struggle.
I so much prefer to not struggle.  I feel better.  I feel fabulous.  I feel more confident, I sleep better, I am so much happier, plus - I lose weight!!!
So, of course, I am not struggling.  Just in case you were wondering ;)
Is it that easy?
I really think it can be!

Bye for now,

Feeling Fabulous!!!

I have not been posting very much at all lately, but I refuse to feel bad about it :) Because, I am feeling really fabulous!
I am maintaining right now, but I am so happy with where my head is.

I am having a lot of fun playing with clothes and putting new outfits together. This has really been helping to keep me on track. Who knew clothes could be so fun and motivating?!? I am eating really well and I am squeezing exercise in wherever I can. Doing lots of fun and active family stuff!
Things are going really well and I am happy. So, how can I feel bad about not blogging?

Right now I am just focusing on family and working around the house. I am on a mission to de-clutter. Not just the places that are seen (the way I usually do) I mean I have been attacking the clutter everywhere. In every. single. closet. It feels really good. I am letting go of a lot of stuff. I am feeling free and happy and pretty confident.

I am not going to try and figure out how to maintain this feeling (like last time).  I am just going to enjoy it, and go with it, and see where it leads me.

I guess I did have a little post in my head :)
I keep thinking that I don't really have much to write.

Anyway I haven't fallen off the face of the earth.
I am not doing really badly and hiding it (like in the past)
I am just happy, and busy, and moving along.

I hope to get writing more, but I am not going to make any guarantees or time limits.
I know how that ends up and I will not go there.

I am making good choices and just enjoying life.
It feels really good :)

Happy Tuesday!
(Oh, and that means it is weigh in day!  I will have to update my chart a.s.a.p. but nothing really exciting is happening in that particular area - happily maintaining for the time being)

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

I got my Wii problem sorted out, so I have updated my weight chart.
I was really surprised with my weight this morning. I am down to 161.26 lbs. Which means somehow in the last week I lost 4.18 lbs! Huh? I do not even know how that makes sense, but that is what happened.
I have noticed lately that no matter how bad I think I am doing, I am actually not really gaining anything. I am pretty good at maintaining now. That makes me happy, because I think it means that I am learning how to eat properly. Well I am not going to over analyze it....much ;)
I am sure when I get back into the swing of exercising regularly again the scale will slow down, but that's okay. I am not so worried about the numbers anymore. I know that I am moving in the right direction.
For me the hard part is working through my junk and convincing myself to just do it! Once I decide it seems so easy. That's it for now.
Happy Tuesday :)
Oh, and I guess that means I better take my 40 lb. progress pic now! I will get it done a.s.a.p. this time - for reals!!! :)

Bye for now,

Chaos, Drama, And My Default Mode

I think my default mode is set to 'self-destruct' :)
Seriously!
Things will be going fine, fantastic even and then (seemingly out of nowhere) chaos and drama erupt. I used to always wonder "Why do these things happen to me?" or "What did I do to deserve this?".
Now I know that these things aren't 'just happening', I am making them happen. I can actually watch the whole process unfold, if I take the time to pay attention.
It is crazy, really!
Why?
The only conclusion I can come up with is that I am still not 100% convinced that I deserve happiness.
It is like I hit my peak happiness level then I stop and freak out a little and go into self destruct mode. When I say peak happiness level - or PHL from now on :) I mean the amount of happiness I feel like I should be allowed (depending on how hard I worked for it) or the amount that I deserve.
I was not aware that I was doing this until recently. A few weeks ago things were going so well.  Everything was fabulous!  Everything!!!  Then I started to think things like 'Why are things going so well?' and 'how can I maintain this'.  And, seriously, it's like I just started to dismantle my own happiness.
Weirdness!
I over analyzed, I questioned and I took a whole bunch of steps backwards.
I think I am a little afraid to move on or something.
I feel like I am at a really huge turning point right now.
I feel like a whole different person and I am sort of having trouble getting my head around all of these changes.
Everyone is noticing that I have lost weight now. It seems like in the last month every person I see tells me how fantastic I look. That is definitely a great thing, but it also usually makes me freak out. In the past it is usually enough to make me gain weight. Not anymore!  I have stopped doing that at least :) I am aware of it now, and I think I know what it is all about.
I think that maybe I am just not used to feeling so good and my self destructive side is saying 'Hey, what's going on here? Why are you happy and smiling all the time? That's not right! That's not normal!' and I pull back and....well, chaos and drama enter the picture.
I am glad I can see it happening now. I am glad that I am not playing the victim anymore, but I am really wondering if my self destructive tendencies will ever be gone.
I don't think so!
I thought in the beginning that this journey was going to be about food, but it really isn't. It is about me deciding that I love myself enough to choose happiness, to choose good things.
Consistently!
I need to keep choosing happiness until that is my default setting and I need to learn to accept the good and stop questioning it.
Of course I deserve to be happy. I deserved to be happy all along. I am just not 100% comfortable claiming it yet, I suppose.
So the plan is: blog, blog and blog some more :) It seems to be what works.
I think it is pretty obvious that I have a lot of turmoil going on inside, because my thoughts are all fighting to be set free and I can't entirely keep up with them. Hopefully as I let them out they will start to be more sensible, but for now I will just write.
I am feeling really good right now, I will just start with baby steps again and work this through.
Anyway, that's all for now.  Thank goodness, right :)  That was a long one!  Hopefully some of it made sense :)  Even if it didn't I feel better, so that is good.

Bye for now,


P.S. I am going to have to update my weight chart when my husband gets home. I am having trouble with the Wii, but I didn't forget :)  If he can get it figured out I will have it all up to date for tomorrows weigh in!

Just A Drama Queen!

I hear birds chirping outside my window right now, and that makes me so happy :) Spring is coming!!! I can feel it.  Yay! 
I am writing because I feel the need.  Who knows what I want to say, I know that there is a lot of stuff going on inside me right now.  I am working through the usual garbage, but I seem to have a block.  I know that when I work my way around it, or over it, or through it that I will feel better.  I just need to work it through.  Soooo here I sit, writing. 
My thoughts are frustrated and disjointed, I hate this feeling.  It is like I am a little disconnected, or something.  I am feeling a little agitated. 
I wonder if maybe the problem is, that there is no problem?  Does that even make any sense?  Things are going really well, when I let them.  I am eating properly-ish ;)  I think I am at the point in the journey where I have to make some serious decisions.  Do I really want to lose any more weight?  Obviously, right?  But what I mean is, do I really want it?  I want to be healthy, I love how great I feel as I lose the weight.  I love that I feel more whole.  I am accepting things about me that I didn't even like to recognize before.  I Love me - I have come a very long way. 
So I am thinking that maybe the problem is this:  I don't have one!  I don't have the urgent need to lose weight now, I know that I am the only thing holding me back.  This journey is only as hard as I choose to make it.  So when the urgency is gone and the excitement, how do I keep going?  Could that be it.  I am just a drama queen at heart and I need the distractions?  Hmmmmm - very possibly. 
I decided when I started this journey that I was going to keep on going "No Matter What!".  Soooooo I won't be quitting, at all, but I am wondering if I am creating a problem because I am used to the turmoil.  Sneaky, sneaky :)  If anyone has made it this far through my jumbled thoughts - What do you think?  It makes sense to me.  I plan to keep writing it out until it all makes sense.  So if you enjoy crazy ramblings and lots (and lots, and lots) of over-analyzing stay tuned!

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

I am, late as usual, with this post. But better late then never, so here it is :) I did weigh myself on Tuesday and I am down to 171.16 lbs. I will be in the 60's soon - Oh my goodness!!! I am super-seriously excited. I know I am probably putting too much importance on the numbers, but I can't seem to really believe that the scale is still moving down. I just had to get rid of a pair of pants that I wore over six years ago, because they are too big! It feels really good. I feel really good. I plan to exercise more, and I really do plan to post more, but right now I am just happy and doing really well. What more could I want? I am charging batteries for the camera right now and will take my thirty pound loss update pic tonight (finally!!!). I will post it a.s.a.p. I am so glad the weekend is finally here. Hope yours is fabulous :)


Happy Friday,

I AM OVERWEIGHT!!!

And, yes - I am yelling!  I am so very happy to post this.  I am finally, finally, overweight.  No longer obese - never again!!!  Not if I can help it.  And I know that I can.  I really can.  I weighed in this morning and I have lost 0.66 lbs. since Tuesday.  I am at 179.08 lbs.  Yay, yay, yay!  Okay, I am a little excited.  I cannot explain to you how much I have hated hearing the voice on Wii Fit telling me every time I weighed in "that's obese!" - ugh! - it drove me CRAZY!!!  But this morning it said "that's overweight".  Awesome!  I am finally over the 25 lbs. lost hump.  It was starting to feel like I would never make it.  It has been really, really easy to lose these last five lbs. or so.  I am being very cautious right now, I am on the lookout for sneak attacks from my 'inner sabotager'.  But so far, so good.  I am going to just go with it and take in this great feeling and let it build.  I am not sure how I will be feeling on Tuesday, but hopefully I will be back to post my official weigh in.  If not, I will do it a.s.a.p.  I am having my wisdom teeth removed on Monday and I am a huge baby, so I am very nervous.  I am on blood thinners, so any kind of surgery freaks me out - a lot!!!  Oh well, I'll be fine.  Just for the record I am happy to post that I have lost 4.1 points off my B.M.I. and 25.02 lbs. - so far!  Have a super-great weekend and sorry for all of my exclamations and italicising (sp?)  I am a little exuberant this morning :)

Bye for now, 


P.S.  I played Just Dance 2 (Wii)  with my sister's last night and it was so much fun.  I definitely recommend it if you are looking for a fun way to get moving!!!  I know that sounded like an advertisement but I just thought the game was a lot of fun :)

Weigh-In Day

Hi :)  I have got to get back into the habit of blogging more often.  I feel like I am a little disconnected right now.  So, more blogging!  Anyway, today is weigh in day, so here I am again.  For some strange reason I wrote a post for last week and saved it but didn't post it, so I will just combine the two posts.  Last Tuesday I had a maintain again.  No change at all.  Today, though, I am down to 181.72 lbs.  I don't even really know how that happened, but I will take it.  The scale is finally moving again.  I had considered not weighing for the month of November, to get over this block I seem to have, but for now I think I will keep it up.  I plan to post more.  I usually feel like it is pointless to keep posting the same weight over and over.  But I am going to be persistent.  Nobody ever got anywhere by giving up!  Today I am down 3.3 more lbs. and I am happy about that.  Time to move forward.  I am so close to being overweight ;)  I cannot wait to be out of the obese category - I hate it here!  Anyway, that is it for now.  Happy Tuesday!

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

Tuesday is here again and, yay for me, that means it's weigh in day :)  I weighed myself and there is no change from last week.  I am maintaining. 
I was a little disappointed when I saw that and then I realized a couple of things.  Number one is that this past weekend was Thanksgiving - and that is usually a problem for me.  And number two is that I am right in the middle of that t.o.m., ugh!  In the past either of those two things would have packed on at least a bit of weight  So I feel like I have been doing really well. 
I have been making good choices.  I have been keeping up with my 30 Day Shred Challenge (I love workout 2, btw).  I have been doing okay. 
I can do better, I know that.  I am sure you guys know it too. 
I have been having thoughts lately of closing up my blog.  I have thought about quitting.  I keep asking myself "What are you really getting from this anyway?".  But I am not going to quit.  I am not going to give up. 
It really does suck to post when I am doing a crappy job, or when the scale isn't moving, or - even worse - moving up!!!  But I am still going to post.  People may find it depressing, I may lose followers.  Maybe nobody will read.  I understand, I love the bloggers who are consistently losing.  They are definitely inspiring.  I hope to one day be there. 
But for now I am going to post where I am at. 
I must have some kind of internal block that will not let me move forward.  I cannot seem to get any more weight off.  I will not stop though.  I never used to follow through on things.  I never held myself accountable for anything. 
I accepted the fact that I was a quitter! 
The fact that I have been at this since April is amazing to me.  It will be six months tomorrow.  For the past six months I have been making better choices, I have been choosing to take better care of myself.  I am happier, I am more confident, I feel like a different person.  Already!!! 
I am going to be grateful for the progress I have made so far, and I know I will make it through all of my goals.  I am having a hard time now, I hate sharing here sometimes - but I am still gonna do it :) 
I haven't quit yet, and I don't plan to. 
So tired of sitting here, I want to move forward - I guess we will see how badly I want it.

Shredding

I did it!!! Day one of the 30 Day Shred, I mean. I was thinking of joining Syl's October Challenge, but I wasn't sure if my DVD would be here on time.  And, to be honest, I was a little scared intimidated to join in.  I figured it would be hard, and horrible and unbearable.  Well, anyway, my copy got here yesterday.  So I started it today, and I am going to challenge myself.  It was hard, for sure, but not as hard as I was expecting.  It seems crazy that I can do this.  I remember when I was so challenged just doing the step exercise on the Wii Fit Plus.  I was so surprised when I finished it.  My 9 y.o. daughter asked why I was so excited and I said "I didn't think I would be able to do it" so she say's "You just don't give yourself enough credit".  Smarty Pants!!!  I guess she has been listening to me :)  Oh, and just so I can look back and see future improvement (on those days when I may want to quit) I have to say:
jumping jacks - Yikes!!!
push ups - Ouch!!!
and sideways, lunge-y thingies with hand weights - Raaaargh!!!  :)

Happy Friday,

Sounds Like A Plan

I am doing really well with my exercise plan and that makes me happy. But, I know that I could definitely be doing better with my eating. It isn't really that I have been doing horribly, I am just feeling a bit out of control.  At the end of the day I'm like "Okay, what did I eat today?".  So I am going to get back into journaling. Every. Single. Thing. I. Eat. Seriously!!! I do not know why I continue to make this journey harder than it has to be. Oh wait, yes I do ;) I like to sabotage myself. You may remember, but if not I talked about it here, here, and here too :)  Well in an effort to make this journey as easy as possible I am going to use the tools that I know will work.  And keeping a food journal absolutely works.  I have started today and I already feel better.  I hate the out of control feeling, so I will get rid of it.  Easy, right Cara?  So just do it already :)  I am also planning on attacking that Evil Sugar Monster that is lurking inside of me.  I am not going to do anything drastic like give up sweets forever.  I applaud everyone who has done it, but at this point I just don't want to.  I figure if I am not giving it up forever, than why even bother?  I am just going to cut waaaaaaay back.  I did it before, so I know it can be done.  I started with my drinks last time.  Nothing but water or tea.  I didn't think I could manage when I began, but then it got to the point that I liked it.  My head was clearer, no more headaches, what's not to like?  Plus that is something I can definitely keep up.  I didn't even miss the other, sugary beverages.  After a while, anyway. So step one is keep up my food journal and step two is get drinking, water that is ;)  Two small steps, but I can already feel the momentum building.

Bye for now,

Guess What...

I had a pair of jeans on yesterday and I realized something. First of all they are bigger. All of them are getting baggy now. Yay me!!! But then I noticed that they were comfortable. That is unheard of!!! Or at least it has been in my world (aka Caraland), for a looooong time. I used to wear my jeans out and then, as soon as I was home, put on my p.j.'s comfy pants. Last night I realized I still had my jeans on and I wasn't even aware of it. Now that is progress ;) I seriously did a happy dance, my husband enjoyed that a lot! LOL! I have been doing really great with my workouts, btw. Haven't missed one yet, and it feels really good. That's it for today - just a short, silly post. Happy Friday!

Bye for now,


P.S. I am counting my happy dance as part of my workout today :)

Weigh-In Day

So, it is Tuesday again, and that means weigh in day, as usual. I am not at all surprised to post that I haven't seen a change this week. At all. I am at exactly the same weight as last week. 183.26 lbs.
You may be surprised that I am not unhappy about this though. I feel good. I feel like I am getting my act together. I feel like I am really doing this. I am reclaiming myself. This is the most weight I have ever lost. Usually I get down to 13-15 lbs. lost and then gain it all back as soon as someone comments on the change.
It used to freak me out when people noticed. I wanted to be invisible, I guess. Now I just want to be me. It doesn't matter what other people say, I am on my way. I am doing this for me. I am so happy that I am not creeping upwards on the scale. But even it that happens, I will work it out.
It just feels like it is my time. I am going to do this. No. Matter. What. I know it. So if the scale is stuck at this number for a while, who cares??? I feel good and I am moving ahead, even if the numbers aren't moving this week. When I have lost all of this weight, I expect to keep it off. So I am taking the time to learn, and grow.
Well that was definitely a lot of typing to say something as simple as 'maintain' :) Oh well! I am feeling good today. I have decided that when I am down another 5 lbs. - well 25 lbs. total lost - that my husband and I are going on a bowling date. Cheesy? Yes! But it will be fun.
I just calculated my B.M.I. and I need to lose like 0.56 lbs. to be considered overweight. That is exciting!!! No longer obese! Wow!!! I can't wait :)
Anyway that's it for now. I did my 1/2 hour on the Wii and 30 crunches.

Bye for now,

Deserving

I have really been struggling through the process of writing this post. The amount of struggle tells me I am onto something big and I am both scared, and excited to get the process started.
I am aware, and have been for quite a while now, that I am pretty self destructive.
Maybe all of us are.
But I am really conscious of it now, and I think know that is a good thing. After all how can I change something if I do not recognize it?
I have struggled with feelings of hate and they have brought me to where I am today.
I choose to love myself. But sometimes, still, those feelings of self-loathing will come out and cause me to derail myself. Or self-destruct. I know that I am doing this to myself and I am finally starting to figure out why.
It is a matter of deserving. I, on some level, have always believed that I do not deserve to be happy. I deserve to have bad things happen to me. I deserve to be uncomfortable, unhealthy, unloved, etc. The list goes on and on and on. I have found a lot of really creative and unpleasant ways to prove to myself again and again just how undeserving I am.
I know that this is not true, now, that I am not undeserving. At least on a conscious level I know this. But there is still a part of me, the self loathing, self-destructive part, that tries to defeat me.
I have been writing this post for a while now, and getting nowhere. I have so many words, but nothing seems sensible. It is as if I do not really want to break free of this. I am sure on some level that is true. So, for today, I will write what I have and see if it moves me forward.
I will work it through.
Little by little.
For as long as it takes.
I am fighting, for all of the good things inside of me. The bad stuff is not entirely ready to let go. But I am not giving up. Maybe if I keep shining a light on this stuff, I will find my way free. I know that it can happen, I have to keep going. It is worth a shot anyway.
This is definitely one of those uncomfortable things I was talking about before.
So.....back to deserving. I have lived my life with the attitude that I do not deserve to be happy. It is so obvious to me now. I have everything I ever wanted and I have not allowed myself to be entirely happy. Because obviously, if you are going to punish yourself, happiness is not allowed. I am not going to catalogue every way that I have denied myself happiness. I think that to do that is to dwell in the dark, and I am shining a light here :)
Please know that I am aware of these instances and not ignoring them, I am just not giving them any more power. I could write and write all of the things I deserved, but I think recognizing them is enough. If not I guess at a later date I can bore you with all of the details ;)
I think I will stop there for now and just get this out there once and for all.

I thought this affirmation was really fitting for today:

Just for today I will practice self-acceptance. The struggle ends with me. I choose to stop struggling. I deserve peace.

I already posted it here, but it works :)

Oh and this is where I found it in the first place!

Hope you have an awesome weekend!
Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

Happy Tuesday :) Today is weigh in day. I am happy to report that my sneaky sabotager (I don't care if this isn't a word, I am using it anyway :P) did not throw me off track. I am 183.26 lbs. this morning and so happy to be over that hump. I just realized yesterday that I am almost a third of the way through my journey. It feels really good to say that. In exactly 3.86 lbs. I will be there! I have a lot of emotional junk and drama and worries swirling around here right now and I am glad that I am not letting my health or happiness take a back seat to the stress. I am not sure how much of that junk I want to put out there, I may just leave it all out of my posts. But I am glad to note that I am finally putting myself first, and keeping me there. Life can be fabulous, if I don't get in my own way ;) I am finding more and more every day that I really do choose the life I want. I can actually do what I want, when I want and the world does not fall apart around me. People can manage their own drama, and I do not have to sucked into their toxic negativity! I am feeling a huge need to purge everything I do not absolutely need, want or love from my life and home. I am ready to feel free! I have had a taste of it and I want it all. Here at home things are really great, my husband and I are on the same page right now - I am going to enjoy this becase, really, how often does that happen? :) I usually get caught up in outside drama and this time we are not letting it infect our happiness. I am usually the fixer in the family (meaning with my mom and sisters), and I am giving up this role. I know that I chose to be that person before, but not anymore. Anyway I am getting rambly again so I will finish this post and get on with my day. I think I can hear the laundry calling - Joy!!!

Bye for now,

I Did It!!!

Hello and Happy Sunday :) I am just doing a quick post today to say - I did it!!!!! I have officially lost 20 lbs. Well 20.62, to be exact. I know that I have done it before, but I was stuck in this crazy mindset that it didn't really count unless it was on weigh in day. Weird, huh? So this time I am posting it and accepting it and moving forward. So, even though it is Sunday, and not Tuesday I am posting my weight. As of this morning I am at 183.48 lbs. I will not give that sneaky saboteur inside the chance to do her stuff. I am posting it and moving along, onto the next challenge :) I am really close to one of my personal goals which is to weigh 178 lbs. The only reason this is a mini goal is because I almost never used to weigh myself and so I have only two key weights I remember being at. One was 178 lbs. and it was when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter and the other is 155 lbs., right before I got married. So for some strange reason I am excited about getting to 178 lbs., and then moving right past it of course :) Hey I just realized something, I have lost at least 10% of my initial weight. That is the first goal I set out to make. Yay for me, I almost let it sneak past without noticing it. That is awesome! Well now I am feeling really good, and I will say goodbye on that note! Hope great things are happening for you today :)

Bye for now,

2 Week Challenge - Day #3

Hey, it's day #3 of my challenge, and I am doing great. I feel so much better when I am exercising. It is crazy. I am doing really well. My food has been on plan, except for two granola bars ;), but I am happy with my progress. It feels good to be focusing on myself again. Life is a lot nicer when I take the time to treat myself right. I have also noticed that everyone around here is happier when I am in a good place. I hate all these obstacles that I keep creating for myself. I feel like such a Drama Queen sometimes :) Anyway, I am doing awesome right now, so I will not dwell. I have done 1/2 of my time on the Wii today and I still need to do my crunches and weights. The good thing about this challenge is that I am not being so restrictive about when I exercise. If I can squeeze ten minutes in I will do it, and as long as I am done when I go to bed it is all good. It makes me feel good, because once I have finished the stuff on my list I have a sense of accomplishment. It is nice! I am going to go and have lunch and I think we are going to go shopping this afternoon so I will be back tomorrow :)

I will be using these affirmations today:

- I am on the road to health and fitness.
- I am at peace with my true self.
- I can achieve anything that I put my mind to.

I found them on this site.

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

Hello :) Happy Tuesday everyone! I was sure my weight would be up again this week, but it actually isn't. I lost .88 lbs - I will take it and be happy about it, a loss is a loss after all. But, I know that I can do better. So this week I will see how well I can do. I am busy with redecorating my daughter's bedroom. I plan to be painting so much that I won't even be able to even think about overeating. She wants to switch rooms with the baby so we are planning on switching and redecorating it for her by the 20th, which is her birthday. It is going to look really awesome! I have this whole big plan and I cannot wait to finish it for her. My husband was a little resistant at first, but now he sees the brilliance that is my plan and he is ready to help out ;) Anyway, that's all that is going down around here right now. I could be eating better and I could be exercising more - my mini goal for next week will be to not have to write that last sentence. I want to give it my ALL. I am going to try and scrub off some paint I just found on my arm - ooooh I am going to Google how many calories painting burns!

So much to do, bye for now

Weigh-In Day

Just a quick post today to track my weight-loss. I was at 191.4 this morning on the scale. That is a loss so I am happy about it. But I am confused a bit because my weight was down a lot more just yesterday. Oh well, that's how it goes I guess. Things are a little hectic and stressful around here right now, but I am not letting it get me down. I am choosing to be happy even though it is a bit more difficult than usual right now. Oh, and my sister wants to have a weight loss challenge this month. We have until the end of this month and whoever loses the lowest percentage of weight pays the other $20. We are having our dinner and a movie night on that day so it'll be really nice to have her paying for part of my evening out :)

Happy Tuesday :)