Weigh-In Day...

was yesterday, of course :)  But, I am posting my weight today, because apparently I am a procrastinator :) My weight yesterday was 151.36 lbs. It feels nice to be getting back on track and I am thinking of a few new ideas and goals. That's it for now. I just wanted to make sure to keep things updated :)
Bye for now,

Here I Go Again!!!

Hello :)
In the last month I have started many posts and not finished them.  I guess I have writer's block :)
I have been figuring some stuff out and maintaining my weight (with a little self-sabotage here and there). 
I really feel like I know myself like I never have before. I am really aware now. This makes some days hard, because I know that I am the main cause of my difficulties. But, in general every day is getting better and I am realizing more and more that I was in control all along.
I do have power and I am ready to get going again!!! 
I have realized that on the days I struggle it is usually because I am making things harder than they have to be.  If I stick to the basics and do simple things it all flows smoothly and I move along.  When I try to make huge changes and shake things up, or if I am hard on myself, I don't move at all. 
I am going to start reading back over some of my earlier post and begin again with the basics :)  I'll put my money where my mouth is and take some of my own advice!  It got me this far! 
I have a feeling that I am 'struggling' now because once I have gotten to my goal - then what?!?!?! 
I have to reassess my goals, come up with some new ones and get this bus moving again. 
I am more than ready to get going.
So far the plan is to start back up with my weekly weigh-ins.  I think it is time.  I will stick with Tuesdays, why not?  So next Tuesday will be weigh in day and I will keep it up until I reach my goal.
If I come up with any more plans I will keep you posted but for now it is going to be to keep it simple, be a great friend to myself, and just do it.

Bye for now,

Progress Pics - 50 lbs. Lost!!! :)

Hi again :)

I kept meaning to put progress pics up when I lost 40 lbs. and I never ended up doing it. 
I am not skipping it this time!  I have officially lost 50 lbs!!!  I am so excited! 
I have made it almost 75% of the way to my goal and as of this morning I only need to lose 18.94 lbs. to get there. 
WOW!!! 
It almost seems unbelievable to me. 

Anyway here are some pics:

 My daughter says I am making a weird face in this one, she's right :)

I am feeling really great! 

Kind of all brand new, and I like it :)  

I know that I am doing this and I know that I am going to be at my goal soon.  

It feels really nice.

So Excited!!!

I am really excited right now!
I have had a pretty long and difficult summer and I am still working through some stuff.  Hard stuff! But I am doing really well with my weight loss, and that is amazing!
In the old days when I was in any sort of emotional discomfort my weight would reflect that - and not in a good way! 
I have been feeling pretty low for the last few months and I am still sticking to my goals.  I still mess up, but in general I have stuck to it.  This is huge!!!
And it is paying off!
Last night I got into my wedding dress, and zipped it up!  I was shocked! 
That has been a goal of mine ever since I started gaining this weight, and I did it!
Then I weighed myself this morning and finally, finally, the Wii said my weight was NORMAL!!!
I have been waiting for this day since I first stepped on that balance board and was told that I was obese.  I did it!!!
I know that I haven't been blogging a lot and I know that I have been stumbling, I almost didn't post this because I hate it to seem like I only write when I am happy with my weight.
But I am excited and happy and I like the feeling. 
I am going to keep it going!
I really do want to dig into some of the crap that I was dealing with this summer and I do want to write a post about depression, but today I am excited.
So this is it :)

Bye for now,

Two Week Challenge - Day 4

Hello :) 
I am back to report that I did finish day three!  I got my workout in for today already too!  So that means day three and four of my challenge are complete. 
It feels good to be moving again, even if it is just a little.  I think it is the feeling of taking charge that is so nice.  I am not floating along, letting things happen.  I am actively moving towards my goals!  I am sure that is why working out feels so good. 
It is funny to realize, as I go along, how much of this journey is in my head.  I work all of my junk out and then I move forward.  I am really finding this whole process pretty fascinating. 
That's it for today.  Thank you for the nice comments on my progress pics yesterday :)  It is really nice to feel the support from fellow bloggers! 
My one year Anniversary (of when I started losing) is coming up on the 13th.  I am hoping to make it to 40 lbs. lost by then.  I am pretty sure I will be there any time now, so I will make it a goal to get there and have my progress pic posted by my anniversary!
Hope your weekend is awesome!!!

Bye for now,

Slacking Off!!!

I am being such a slacker. I did not post my weight on Tuesday. I do not want to make this a habit. Keeping this blog going is very important to me. Lately I have been doing the bare minimum to keep it going and I am not okay with that. I will not miss posting my weight anymore. I will start posting more. I am doing pretty well right now. But I am not feeling the fire as much. You know? That feeling that keeps you going and feeling inspired. I am not feeling it as much and so I slack off. I am still losing - slowly. But I know that I can do better.  I am starting to get back into it again, recognizing the progress I have made so far.  I am so close to 30 lbs lost and that amazes me.  I am wearing my engagement ring and my wedding band again.  Yay!!!  I am able to try clothes on in the regular section of the store - which is awesome, but a little overwhelming.  I am happier!  The last one is the most important of course.  I am going to spend some time being grateful and accepting myself.  I know that I will achieve my goals.  I plan on focusing on me again.  Hey, look at that - I can feel the excitement coming back!  Every time I post I feel it again a little more, and so, since I am not a dummy, I will post more.  Whatever I think or feel or really anything at all that keeps me going, I will be putting up here.  I am ready to get moving again.  Oh yeah my weight on Tuesday was 177.10 lbs.  I have three more to go until I am at 30 lost - Yay!!! 
Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American bloggy friends :)

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

Tuesday again. I am doing okay. I know I could be doing better, though. SO that will be the plan this week.  I decided to go through my closet and try everything on because things are really starting to fit me differently now.  These last few pounds really seem to be making a difference.  So I tried on everything.  Even the stuff that was 'too small', and guess what!  It was all so big on me.  All my clothes from last winter are so big now.  That feels really weird.  Even in the beginning when I was so focused I still had a hard time believing that I could actually do it.  That I could actually get smaller and healthier.  But I am doing it!  I tried on a strapless, formal dress from my sister's wedding three years ago.  Back then I had to wear this one piece torture device bra thingy and have everything sucked in and then it would zip.  Yesterday I just threw it on and my husband zipped it right up and it was baggy.  Wow!!!  Anyway, enough of that.  This morning my weight was 179.74 lbs.  I am 1.74 lbs away from my first real goal.  I was 178 lbs ten years ago when I got pregnant with my daughter.  It is funny because back then I had gained quite a bit of weight trying to get pregnant and taking hormones that my doctor should not have given me.  I was so upset to be at 178 lbs.  It is amazing how different I feel coming at it from the other side.  I cannot wait to weight that much.  I am really doing it this time.  Finally!  Well that is it for today.

Bye for now,

I Did It!!!

Hello and Happy Sunday :) I am just doing a quick post today to say - I did it!!!!! I have officially lost 20 lbs. Well 20.62, to be exact. I know that I have done it before, but I was stuck in this crazy mindset that it didn't really count unless it was on weigh in day. Weird, huh? So this time I am posting it and accepting it and moving forward. So, even though it is Sunday, and not Tuesday I am posting my weight. As of this morning I am at 183.48 lbs. I will not give that sneaky saboteur inside the chance to do her stuff. I am posting it and moving along, onto the next challenge :) I am really close to one of my personal goals which is to weigh 178 lbs. The only reason this is a mini goal is because I almost never used to weigh myself and so I have only two key weights I remember being at. One was 178 lbs. and it was when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter and the other is 155 lbs., right before I got married. So for some strange reason I am excited about getting to 178 lbs., and then moving right past it of course :) Hey I just realized something, I have lost at least 10% of my initial weight. That is the first goal I set out to make. Yay for me, I almost let it sneak past without noticing it. That is awesome! Well now I am feeling really good, and I will say goodbye on that note! Hope great things are happening for you today :)

Bye for now,

Weigh-In Day

Hello :) Happy Tuesday everyone! I was sure my weight would be up again this week, but it actually isn't. I lost .88 lbs - I will take it and be happy about it, a loss is a loss after all. But, I know that I can do better. So this week I will see how well I can do. I am busy with redecorating my daughter's bedroom. I plan to be painting so much that I won't even be able to even think about overeating. She wants to switch rooms with the baby so we are planning on switching and redecorating it for her by the 20th, which is her birthday. It is going to look really awesome! I have this whole big plan and I cannot wait to finish it for her. My husband was a little resistant at first, but now he sees the brilliance that is my plan and he is ready to help out ;) Anyway, that's all that is going down around here right now. I could be eating better and I could be exercising more - my mini goal for next week will be to not have to write that last sentence. I want to give it my ALL. I am going to try and scrub off some paint I just found on my arm - ooooh I am going to Google how many calories painting burns!

So much to do, bye for now

A Good Day :)

Today is a good day :) I am doing so well. It feels really good! I did really great yesterday, as well. I am setting goals and writing them down. I am keeping track of my food and I am being kind to myself. Yesterday I read this post written by Chris at A Deliberate Life and it really helped put things into perspective for me. Do I really want to quit? Of course not. I refuse to stand still and accept whatever I get. I am going to take control of my life. I am going to create it as beautifully as I can imagine. I am ready to accept all of the good things that are coming to me. It is amazing to me that after all the struggles it is really just as simple as choosing. I am just choosing to be better. That is it. I am choosing the good and accepting only the best things for me. I am getting healthy because I decided to quit trying. I decided that trying is nothing but a big waste of my time. I will not try to feel better and eat healthier and enjoy my life. I will just do it. Anyway, that's all :) I was just feeling really good and wanted to keep a reminder for myself. Accepting my good feels a lot better than quitting does!

Happy Friday!

Sneaky, Sneaky, Sneaky!!!

Hi :)

I am thinking about a lot of things lately. When am I not??? I thought I was doing pretty well with my eating. I am on the lookout for trip-ups and the sneaky little things my inner fat-girl may be trying to toss in my way. I thought I was doing pretty well. But then I realized I am still playing the tomorrow game. This is like when I say to myself, 'I will eat better tomorrow' or, 'I will exercise tomorrow'. I'm sure we all know how that goes. But I thought I was done with that. I was surprised when I found myself thinking just the other day, "When I am at my goal I won't be eating like this". That is exactly-the-same as the tomorrow game. I never even realized I was doing it still. There are still some things I am doing that are sabotaging me, and I tell myself I will stop when I make it to my goal. HUH!?!?!? I am really glad that I spotted this trap. I am looking on the bright side here :) Now that I hear that voice I can shut it down!!! When I hear it I can stop it. I want to make a whole lifestyle change. I do not want to diet. That will not work for me. So I need to start eating the way I will be eating at my goal, now. I will live like I am thin and healthy, eat like I am thin and healthy and then guess what - I will BE thin and healthy!!! I am really glad I spotted that sneaky, backwards thinking. So from now on when I am about to eat something that I don't really want or when I am tempted to just sit by and wait for my goal to come to me I will stop and act. I am going to be more conscious and aware and I am going to live. I am going to move towards my goal and not wait for it to magically get here. I am going to do it. I am such a rambler, huh? I wonder if anyone else can even make sense out of what I am saying. Well I get it, at least :)

One more point for Cara - Yay me!!!

Weigh-In Day

OK, so, today is weigh-in day again - YAY!!! Ummmmm - NOT! :) I am not too happy with today's weight. But, I guess, on the bright side of things I know exactly what happened. So that is good atleast. Now I know what to avoid. Today's weight is 197.34, btw. Yuck, it is a gain. I almost didn't want to post it and I got a bit upset, but then I chilled out. I realize that this is just part of my journey and I can either make excuses and beat myself up, or I can learn and move on. I am choosing to learn and I am choosing to love myself and be a good friend and just move along already. I have work to do :) I know what the issue is, the same one that often trips me up. It usually starts when I eat around certain people. In this case it is my mom. For some reason being around a few certain people makes it so hard to stick to my plan. I am not going to accept this excuse anymore though. Maybe I used to get off track when I was around certain people, but from now on I do not accept this excuse. Because that is exactly what it is. My inner sabotager says, 'you always overeat when your mom is over, or you m.i.l. or your sister', so I let it happen. Then I can just use the same old excuse, but I spotted it this time and I no longer accept this excuse. I find it is easy to stick to my goals no matter who I am around!!! I am definitely going to affirm this often, and I am making sure to keep my eyes open for some of my other usual trip ups:)

Happy Tuesday everyone!!!