If It Is Important

I have no reasons or excuses for not posting this week. I mean, I could probably give a bunch ;) 
But really, I just didn't do it, and that's it. 
Next week I want to get my weight posted on Tuesday.  If it is really important to me I will do it. 
Anyway my weight on Tuesday was 148.92 lbs. 
I guess it is safe to say I maintained, since I lost about .022 lbs. 
I am not looking to maintain, I would really like to move along, but it is what it is. 
And, just like posting my weigh ins, if this is important to me I will do it!  No excuses!!! 
I have noticed that on weeks when I do my best and try harder I get results, and on weeks that I make excuses and don't really put in much effort........ 
I can do this, I just have to convince myself sometimes that I want to :)
It is all about working through the stuff in my head and then all the other stuff seems to fall into place.
I know it sounds really easy, it can be too.  I know the things that help me.  Affirmations, blogging, being a good friend to myself, being consistent, not making excuses!
A quote keeps popping up for me all over the place. 
It is :  "If it is important to you, you will find a way.  If not you'll find an excuse." 
So true!
So, let's give this another go, shall we :)

No More 'Spinning Tires', I'm Ready To 'Kick Up Some Mud'!!!

A while ago someone asked me if people from my 'real life' read my blog and if it influenced my writing. My answer was no. As far as I am aware nobody that I actually know reads my blog.  And I didn't think it would influence my writing if they did.

But I was wrong!

I am still not sure if anyone I 'know' reads, but I now know that my writing is influenced by my readers.

It has to be!

Because if I wasn't influenced by what my readers may think I would be posting a lot more. I would post more of the struggle, the way I did in the beginning.
The way I intended to post all along.  I would journal this whole journey - good and bad -  and I would let it all out.

I started this blog for me. I used it to sort out my feelings and issues where food is concerned and I used it to learn more about myself and grow. I left it open for others to read and I even mention it to people in my life. But I never really cared if anyone read or not.
I figured if they did that was good and fine, but ultimately this was for me.

Now I feel like I am being a downer if I post my garbage.  I feel like I should only post certain things.
This is a problem!

I am either going to do this or I am not. I obviously have to do it the way that works for me, so I have to continue this journey the way I started it.
I think that I must have been using this as an excuse for a while now.  Something like "Don't post this, nobody wants to read this", so instead I remain silent and (shockingly) I am not making any progress.

I need to get back to basics.  I need to get back to what works for me! 
It really occurred to me the other day that I can either have excuses or I can have results.  I am so tired of the excuses!

I am working through a lot of things right now and I need to write them out.  I am feeling a bit uncentered and out of control.  Like I don't know where to head next, and I want to work these things through.
I am tired of sitting here with my tires spinning!  So, I guess, I am going to kick up some mud and get myself out of this rut! :)

I do want to say that I love all of my readers and supporters and I have been more inspired by you guys than you will ever know.  So please understand, if I get depressing or moody, I am not doing it to bring anyone down.  I am doing it to work it through and get it out.  I feel like this is what works for me, and I am ready to move on now.

Oh, and if anyone stuck through this post 'til the end, thanks :)  I am sure it was a bit rambly and incoherent, but that's where I'm at right now I guess :)

I will be back tomorrow to update my weekly weigh in chart and start fresh.  Weigh-in Day is Tuesday and I am so ready to start year two of this journey!

Bye for now,